14 things to think about over break.

1) Buying the expensive/heavy beers does not make you seem cooler or older. It does make your projectile vomit go further, and your stomach to expand like you are Tim Allen in Santa Clause.
2) Having sex with the "crazy girl" is a lot less cool when the doctor has to prescribe you a cream.
3) Quoting Step Brothers is just not funny anymore. If you are that one guy that is still quoting an Adam Sandler movie... you need to stop too.
4) Popularity does not come from blasting Dave Matthews, Lil Wayne,or Party in the USA from your over priced speakers.
5) Friend requesting hot girls that you don't know from upstairs is creepy, and does not raise your chances of getting with them. (unless you are Tiger Woods)
6) When at a bar and trying to dance with a girl, rubbing up against her and whispering the lyrics in her ear will not turn her on or give the impression that you are "smooth". Especially if the lyrics are "I wish I could F*** every girl in the world."
7) With roommates it's a lot harder to watch guilty pleasure shows. (Example- Jonand Kate Plus 8, All VH1 shows, Porn)
8) You can't drink more than everybody.
9) You don't need to jump on every 5-5-5 deal. Dominos is not going out of business, and you are getting chunky.
10) Although it is true "Beer before Liquor never been sicker." If you drink a ton of both, no matter the order, you are going to vomit.
11) Don't bother inviting your friends from home to come visit you. No matter what your roommates tell you...They hate your friends from home.
12) Nobody cares about that race you won in high school. Nobody cares about that hot girl you dated. Nobody wants to hear about that time you almost dunked. High school sucked. That's why you left.
13) When you text your friends " IdM SoooOOo DruNK!!11" they know you are sitting in your room drinking your first beer and watching Animal Planet. You are not tricking anyone.
14) You didn't have 15 shots that one night. You had 4.